It’s Not That Simple: 5 Reasons Women Refuse Shelter

May 5

What if the only place you had to sleep at night felt more dangerous than the streets?

That’s the reality many of our guests at UP face every day. And before we go further, let’s be clear:

Even if every woman wanted a shelter bed tonight, we don’t have enough.

Louisville’s shelters are full most nights. We hear it from our clients. We see it in the numbers. This is a crisis of both capacity and safety.

At UP, we’re committed to not only providing support—but also to shining a light on the deeper barriers to safe housing that too often go unseen. Because when we understand the full story, we’re better equipped to change it.

So when people ask, “Why don’t they just go to a shelter?”—we know it’s not that simple.

Many women experiencing homelessness avoid shelters because they’ve been hurt, threatened, or retraumatized there before. Choosing to sleep outside isn’t a matter of convenience. For many, it’s a matter of survival.

Progress is happening—just not fast enough.

With partners like Volunteers of America expanding family shelter capacity and St. John Center’s launch of Sheehan Landing, new solutions are in motion. The City of Louisville has also named affordable housing a top priority, with plans underway to increase housing availability.

These are all steps in the right direction—but they take time. And tonight, the need is immediate. Even with progress on the horizon, too many women still have nowhere safe to go when the sun goes down.

Here’s why many women still avoid shelters:

1. Safety from Abusers

Some women are fleeing violent partners and fear being found in a shelter with no anonymity or security. A bed isn’t safe if it puts them in harm’s way.

2. Sexual Assault in Shelters

Sadly, shelters are not always safe spaces. Some women have experienced assault in these settings—leaving lasting trauma and deep mistrust.

3. Theft and Instability

Imagine losing your last possessions while you sleep. Many women report being robbed in shelters—adding another layer of instability and fear.

4. Triggers for Recovery

For women in recovery, the presence of active drug use in shelters can threaten their sobriety. Many choose to avoid these environments to stay well.

5. Dehumanizing Treatment

We’ve heard too many stories of shelter staff treating guests with suspicion or cruelty. When dignity is stripped away, women often feel safer outside.

At UP, we take a different approach. We believe every woman and child deserves dignity, choice, and safety—and we’re proud to offer a trauma-informed, low-barrier space that centers those values.

This post is part of our broader effort to shine a light on the invisible barriers to safe housing and invite our community into deeper understanding and action.

But we can’t do it alone. We need more safe options. We need more partners. We need a community that understands the complexity—and doesn’t oversimplify it.

Let’s stop asking, “Why don’t they just go to a shelter?”

Instead, let’s ask: How can we create spaces where every woman feels safe enough to say yes?

Want to help us change the story?